Sexual Guidance for Marired People and Singles Who Want to Get Pregnant

Missionary
If sex was weight lifting, the missionary position would be the bench press. It’s a mainstay in our society and the ideal pose for pregnancy. Lie between her spread legs, so that you’re lying on top of her and are face-to-face. While supporting your weight on your elbows or hands, insert your erect penis up into her, so it’s parallel to her vaginal walls. Variations can include her wrapping her legs around your waist to change the shape of her vagina, which will alter the sensation for both of you.

Classic Rear Entry, Kneeling
Also called doggie style, this position allows for sensuously deep penetration, which you’ll both enjoy. It also is said to be the best for hitting the elusive G-spot and allows you to stroke her clitoris, breasts, hair and back–all powerful erogenous zones. Position yourself so you’re kneeling behind your partner, who should be before you on her hands and knees. While kneeling, insert yourself and remain between her legs either upright or leaning over so your body drapes over hers. Take care while thrusting, since her wide-open vagina may allow you such penetration that you’ll hit her cervix, something she can find painful.

Seated Missionary
This is a good position if you want to rest your elbows or feel that you are crushing her in the standard missionary position. Sit between her legs, with her knees bent, while keeping your legs spread wide. Ease yourself into her vagina by wriggling toward her and leaning forward. The limitedthrusting power is compensated by the more direct penetration.

Knees To Chest
This is a more advanced missionary position that requires some flexibility on her part and some strength on yours. Enter her as you would in the standard missionary position, but instead of simply spreading her legs, have her lift her knees to her chest and hook her ankles over your shoulders, while you support your weight on your hands. This gives you greater penetration and stimulates the back walls of her vagina.

Woman Astride
These positions have plenty of advantages, including deeper penetration and more exquisite sensations for both of you. You also get a full view of the action and can touch her clitoris and play with her breasts. Enter this position by getting into the woman-on-top missionary first. Then have her draw her knees up until she’s in a kneeling position, straddling your hips and sitting atop your pelvis. If need be, she can relieve some of her weight from your pelvis by leaning back and supporting herself on your thighs.

If you really want to increase your pregnancy chances, start rotating these moves. Remember that your goals are to get your wife or spouse pregnant. Use various routines and positions to maximize the chances. Depending on your health situation, alternating the positions is a great idea.

Here are the top positions with the highest probability:

Missionary Position (Man on top)
Overwhelmingly, experts and parents alike agree that having the man positioned on top offers the greatest possibility of conception. The degree of penetration combined with the prone position of the woman allows the sperm to be deposited near the cervical opening. Additional “pluses” for this position allow both partners to communicate through sensual looks, intimate kisses, touch and oral stimulation of breasts and nipples (for both partners!), and movement.

From Behind (doggy style)
The woman kneels before the man, facing away. Penetration is then from behind, enabling the man to enter with deeper thrusts and deposit the sperm close to the cervix. Due to the control this offers the man, his orgasms may be more intense as well.

Want to have even more fun with this position? The man can reach around and fondle his partner’s breast or clitoris during intercourse and perhaps even following his own orgasm for additional stimulation. The woman may find she can pleasure her partner by reaching between, “tickling” his testicles gently as he moves and/or stroking the base of his penis. The resulting orgasms may surprise you both!

Spooning
The woman lays with her back to her partner and he cuddles her from behind. Penetration will not be as deep, but both partners are often quite relaxed which can also lead to achieving conception. The woman is able to move against her partner, inviting stimulation and allowing him to enter her from behind. The man is able to manually stimulate the woman’s breasts and clitoris. Gentle kisses and communication between the two of you may ignite more pleasure. Something to try? The woman may want to help guide her partner’s touch. She may also be able to reach and stroke him as he enters.

Australia's Fertility Gold Coast, Fertilitygc Offers Best Obstetric and Gynaecological Services to All Patients

After delivering more than 15,000 babies including 500 babies through their IVF services, the team of Fertility Gold Coast can claim they know how it is done. Led by Dr Timothy O'Dowd, Dr Andrew Cary, Dr Michael Flynn, Dr Gary Swift, Dr Benjamin Bopp, and Dr Miriam Lee, this dynamic team has been able to give couples what they have been asking for: a baby or the possibility to be called parents.

This team is kept busy by being involved in several committees, support groups and professional bodies with the single purpose of improving obstetric, gynaecology and infertility services on the Gold Coast.

Fertility Gold Coast also attracts patients from all over the world to their state of the art facility located next to Pindara Private Hospital.


Here is a list of the services that Fertility Gold Spot can offer you. It provides assisted Reproduction Services to manage both male, female and combined infertility:
• IVF
• Semen Analysis
• Sperm Chromatin Structure Assay
• Pre-Implantation Genetic Diagnosis of the Embryo (PGD)
• Assisted Hatching of Embryos
• Semen Freezing & Storage (including pre-vasectomy & pre-chemotherapy)
• Testicular & Epididymal Sperm Retrieval (including post-vasectomy & reversal failure)
• Donor Sperm & Donor Egg Program
• Timed Intra-Uterine Insemination
• Intracytoplasmic Sperm Injection (ICSI)
• Embryo Freezing & Storage
• Oocyte (Egg) Freezing (including pre-chemotherapy or for fertility protection)

If you want to contact them in Australia, here is how you can do so:

Tel: 07 5564 8455 fax: 07 5564 8414 email: fertilitygc@qfg.com.au

The Rise of Infidelity Cases: Fertility/Infertility Causes, Negotiated Wedlock, Open Relationships or Monogamy 2.0

Dear Fertility Q&A Confidential,

My husband and I have been married for about 18 years. We have two beautiful daughters and one handsome son. Right before he turned 35 years, I noticed some changes in him. He started complaining about our marital sex life. He never complained about anything before. I tried everything I knew from reading books to inviting him to see a shrink with me in an effort to rekindle the relationship. Most of the time, I missed the intimacy we had. I can no longer get it on with him. Around the same time, I started observing his diminished desires for intimacy. I am at my wits end. His sex drive seemed to greatly decrease. It is also around this time that his company started running into financial problems. He had to lay off many employees because of the financial market which dried up credit. At the same time, I have continued to be as supportive as possible. I do not know whether he is cheating on me. We used to discuss infidelity before. He used to tease me that he would only go for the "pretty twenty-year-old intern." My husband used to be very funny. He seems to lose his laughter and sense of humor. One thing he has talking about lately is that he thought he got married too early. We were college sweethearts who got into our exclusive relationship. For a long time now, we have been trying to have a baby boy in order to have two boys and two girls. I can not tell whether he is tired of trying or depressed over all his efforts that have not brought me any pregnancy. I have long tried to take it easy by not pressuring him. I am 33 years old. I do not want to wait too long before getting pregnant. Where have I gone wrong? What should I tell him? To help him find his mojo, I am even willing to let him see other girls who are not our mutual friends. Please help me rescue our marital life and find happiness again. (Anonymous Restless New York Wife).

Dear Anonymous Restless New York Wife,

Thank you for writing to Q&A Confidential. You addressed many issues in your message. We will try to address them in view of what is known about our contemporary times and men who are advancing in age. First thing first, you guys are parents and business owners. These two activities bring a lot of stress. You did not mention whether you are an at-home mom. But I imagine that you have your hands full. Raising three kids in New York City while apparently having some fertility issues as related to your fruitless efforts to get pregnant is a major undertaking. You did not mention in your letter how much help you get from your husband or anybody else. As far as your marital life is concerned, I am not sure whether it is all your husband's fault. Remember that it takes two to tango. A tired and depressed man is not going to enjoy intimacy at 100%. You stated that his business has been running into financial problems. He has been very preoccupied lately. Ruling out any other health problems, that may be one of the sources of his midlife crisis.

In your message, you stated that your husband has been complaining about getting hitched too early. Apparently, both of you did not have time to sow your wild oats. You also stated that you were college sweethearts who dated exclusive. I can not tell you whether you are tired of each other after 18 years, a business and three beautiful daughters and one handsome son. Well, if we need to let the reality set in. That may be the case. Many couples call it quits after all of these memories and years together. You would not be the first ones to go through a separation or a divorce. But it appears that you are willing to do anything, whatever it takes to hang onto what you have with this man. The other question I would like to ask you is whether he has a history of depression. At that point, I would advise you to encourage him to discuss his problems with his doctor or a marriage counselor. This way, we can rule out any health issues.

I also want to congratulate you for wanting to see a shrink or a marriage counselor. Go ahead and make sure both of you see a marriage counselor if you want to save the marriage. It will be time and money well spent. There are a signs that he may be walking out on you. You talked about his non-interest in intimacy. He just does not care about pleasing you and making love to you. Have you recently checked the signs of infidelity? If no medical condition exists, he has been acting odd enough. His doctor can ask him to have a blood test whose reading may show that he has low testosterone levels. That may be one of the reasons why is libido is so low. Keep in mind that testosterone is the male hormone that drives sexual desire and other elements of male sexuality. It also governs growth of facial and pubic air and the deepening of the male voice. Also, testosterone helps build muscle and bone mass. As men age, testosterone levels gradually decline, but they do not drop that fast. It is a gradual change. At 35, would your husband be in that category? Men with low T may encounter some of the changes women experience after menopause - a higher risk of bone thinning that can lead to osteoporosis and fractures, increased irritability, problems concentrating, depression and even hot flashes. Unfortunately, besides low libido, low testosterone (T) can also lead to ED or erectile dysfunction, low energy and low bone density. Now, you may have a few clues as to where his sex drive goes. Many studies have shown that low testosterone, if left untreated, may present some clear dangers. Men with low T may not live as long as men with normal T levels. Many researchers state that this hormonal decline can increase the risk of cardiovascular disease, type 2 diabetes, metabolic syndrome - a combination of abdominal obesity, high blood pressure and high blood sugar. Unfortunately, research has not shown that reducing these risks or replacing T can reduce the risk of those disorders. There is a good chance that your husband's doctor may recommend testosterone replacement if the blood test results show that is what he needs. T replacement is often recommended for low libido, ED or erectile dysfunction, low bone density, loss of strength or muscle mass, low energy and depression. In the long run, testosterone replacement may have a positive development on diabetes. Researchers are still trying to answer this question. Keep in mind that low T has also been linked to diabetes. Your husband's doctor will also rule that out.

You have asked us to help you find happiness again. In the preceding sentence, you stated that you are even willing to let your husband date other girls as long as they are not mutual friends, exes or co-workers. Just be careful about what you are asking for. You may be desperately wanting to hang onto your husband, but if he wants to adopt a new lifestyle, there is not much you can do to stop him. You are about to open another can of worms. I hope you have not persuaded him to look outside your marriage as if that was a good solution to the problem. By giving him carte blanche, you may be inviting other types of problems. By giving him this option, you are telling him that it is ok to go ahead and start sowing his wild oats.

Negotiated Wedlock, Open Fidelity, Open Relationships, Family Arrangement or Affair, Extramarital Activity or Monogamy 2.0: Whatever you want to call this new phenomenon of sleeping around.

I am interested in finding out what type of relationship you have with this man, your husband. From Woodstock, we may have inherited this push for negotiated wedlock, open fidelity or monogamy 2.0. Well, let me just say that you just creating your husband's fantasy. You have just given him a pass to sleep around with any women who are not known in your immediate surroundings. Who is to say that he is going to respect this new vow? Are you ready to deal with jealousy issues? What messages are you sending out about the institution of marriage?
Well, we must recognize that for the past few decades, it has come under a lot of attack from many corners. What is clear is that married couples get bored over time. But what is supposed to be the solution to boredom? Letting your husband have his wish and fantasy by sleeping around? A lot of our contemporary new age couples are ready to accept the "for richer, for poorer" stuff but have issues with "forsaking all others."

More and more couples 2.0 are getting engaged into sexual arrangements just to have a high, a temporary one. They express that the ends justify the means. By that, they mean that once the other partner has been down this road, they often patch things up and have awesome sex again. This may work for some, but it will never work for the majority. At this point, it is worth asking wether men and women were born to be monogamous animals. Some will answer that monogamy is a choice. Nevertheless, casual hookups which are not to be confused with one-night stands or prostitution, are all the rage among married couples. Matrimony will never be the same. The recent technological advances in communications, the Internet, cell phone, texting or sexting, women's empowerment and education that tend to surpass men's give rise to rigid individualism and heightened sense of privacy and entitlement. It is not uncommon for your husband to have married friends who talk about "low-impact hookups, fuck buddies and friends with benefits." They have long abandoned the expectation that all great relationships must be anchored on monogamy. They prefer to be in "partnered nonmonogamy" which stands for a relationship between two committed adults who embark on extramarital dalliances. If the 1970s had the swinging couples, our times have seen the rise of these couples. Couples are trespassing and going to the realm of infidelity.

Besides those who choose to be unfaithful to their partners, you will find a large group of people who ask all the reasonable and logical questions before they settle on some type of arrangements. They may reason that they do not want to lose what they had with the other partner. They do not want to wreck their kids' lives. They do not want to lose their business partners or lose money to contested custody battles and divorce proceedings. Tristan Taormino, Author of "Opening Up: A Guide to Crating and Sustaining Open Relationships, writes about these people, "...I'm looking for something else, but I don't need to wreck my relationship in order to get these other sexual needs fulfilled..."

Without even thinking about it, you are entering the new territory of 'designer relationships' which allows you to experience your separateness as well as your connection. In other words, sexual fidelity is not the only measure or standard. These couples have managed to agree on other measures. Gay guys have long been using arrangements in their relationships. Straight people are ready to copy a few pages from their books. By letting your husband see other girls, you are hoping that your commitments will become stronger.

You also stated that you have been trying to get pregnant. Thus far, these efforts have been fruitless. It may be time that both of you take a break, go on some escape. Take a vacation to renew yourself. Is it the time to advise him to see other women?

We hope that you were pleased with our long answer. It was a pleasure to address some of your issues. Keep them coming!

Ask a Question - Sexual Guidance for Singles & Married People: Issues and Answers: Introducing a new Series on Fertility and Infertility

In an effort to satisfy most of our readers, we are introducing a new series of questions and answers on some important fertility and infertility issues. Our readers have informed us that their relationships have a lot of problems. They may be at the root of their fertility issues. In trying to answer these questions, we will try to throw out the myths.

This series will give voice and a forum to many people who have unique questions about sexual issues impacting their fertility.

We hope to help as many people as possible.

Go ahead and post your questions in the comment area below.